Aiden's Journey to Earth

His Story

Aiden Tomas O'Callahan Johnson was born on September 28, 2005 @ 11:43pm weighing 3lbs 5oz and 16 inches long.  He was delivered in a cold operating room and was born blue.  The next fifty days was a roller coaster and an eye opener to life.

A few things you should know about me first.  I have what they call a bicornuate uterus.  It almost looks like a heart but the middle of it comes all the way down and almost touching my cervix, making it look like I have 2 uterus.  So from the get go, my child is robbed of a full and perfect uterus to grow in.  I had 2 miscarriages leading up to Aiden's birth which were very difficult for me.

My doctor's wanted to follow me closely because of the uterus.  So I had internal ultrasounds every other week.  At 19 weeks, we found out we were having a son.  I was so happy because I've always wanted a son.  Although, my mother wasn't too happy as she wanted me to have a girl.  During week 26's ultrasound, when the doctor pulled that god forsaken thing from me, I started to bleed.  I was rushed up to the Labor and Delivery floor.  I didn't pass go and I sure in the hell didn't collect my 200 dollars!  I was petrified.  I was alone.  All my family was in Alabama, my husband's family lives in Washington/Idaho area and here I was stuck in Connecticut, 22 years old, all alone and my husband is at work.

Shortly after getting into my room, I went to use the bathroom.  (Warning:  If you got a weak stomach this probably is not for you)  I passed a huge clot.  I pulled the emergency cord and I was screaming.  Crying in fear.  My son cannot come right now.  What if something happens to him?  What if...no I did not want to think that.  Nurses and doctors came flooding into my room.  I was put into my bed immediately, monitors went here and there.  My cervix was checked.  They shoved an IV into my veins.  I felt like everything was falling apart around me and still I'm all alone.  After the doctor checked my cervix, I peeked over at my door, which was still wide open during all this, and there stood my husband.  I don't know who was scared more, him or me.  He was just frozen.  I remember the doctor telling him it was O.K., he could go set by his wife.  The doctor informed us we would be in the hospital awhile.

Later that afternoon, my doctor comes back to give us the test results from the swab test.  This test checks for hormones that are secreted right before birth occurs.  It came back positive.  My son would be here within 2 weeks.  He let us know it was not a 100% accurate test but more often than not, it is usually right.  The next 48 hours I was injected with steroids that speeds up the development of my baby's lungs.  It will give him a better chance of survival after he is born.  After day 4 and with the bleeding gone, I was sent home on full bed rest until my baby was born.

September 28th @ 3:30am, I awoke with horrible pains in my back.  I got up and went to the bathroom.  Nothing unusual, so I went and took some Tylenol and tried to lay back down.  I couldn't.  I sat up on the side of my bed and was rocking back and forth.  Tony wakes and asks me whats wrong.  I tell him I think I need to go to the hospital.  He springs from the bed, immediately calling the duty officer letting him know where he would be.

I get to the hospital and they put the monitors on me.  The place was so quite I could hear the entire conversation down the hall where these two women were talking.  I could not stay in the bed no more than 5 minutes at a time.  I constantly felt like I had to pee and the back pains were killing me.  The nurse did everything from rubbing my shoulders, to giving me these hot packet things to put on my back.  She has called the doctor several times and he just keeps telling her, he would be in on his rounds at 7AM!  That pissed me off.  Dr. Dilulo finally shows up to check me.  I was 2 to 3cm dilated and 100% effaced!!!!!!!!  If I wasn't pregnant and totally out of my mind I could have just bitched slapped him for making me wait like that.  So a repeat of what happened two weeks prior, happened.  I was rushed to my room, IV put in, I had 2 doctors, about eight nurses, it was total chaos.  I remember looking up and seeing 6 IV bags hanging on that pole.  We were in the 'stop labor' phase.  In the mist of it all, I remember telling my husband I was sorry on more than one occasion.  In so many ways, I felt like I had let him down and my son because of my problems.  He reassured me he still loved me, it was not my fault and Aiden would be just fine.

At 9pm I told Tony to see if my catheter bag was full.  It wasn't.  I said, "I think I just pee'd myself."  He lifts the blanket and his eyes got big as half dollar coins!  I knew, KNEW something was terribly wrong.  He runs out of the room and heads for the nurses' station.  Next thing I know here comes a flood of nurses, along with the charge nurse.  I was bleeding and I was bleeding bad.  They checked me and I was still 2-3cm.  I heard somewhere in the middle of that conversation that they had called Dr. Auerbach and he was on his way.  I could feel the contractions.  They were coming frequently.  Sarah, who was my nurse was so sweet too me.  She would talk about things to distract me from what was going on.

The doctor arrives and again I'm checked.  At this point I am 6-7cm and 100%.  He did an ultrasound to make sure the baby was head down.  They gave my husband scrubs to put on and rushed me to the Operating Room.  Sarah was at my side the whole time.  I was moved to that cold, cold metal table.  It felt like I had just walked into an ice box.  Finally, my husband arrives in his blues, (laughable) and was on my right side.  Sarah was on my left.  The doctor and surgeon tech was at 'that' end.  We were just "hanging" out.  The contractions were getting unbearable.  I looked over at Sarah and pleaded for pain medication.  I couldn't have anything due to all the medication I was on and the fact of how far a long I was.  I think at one point I looked over at my husband and told him I better get a big fat steak after this.  The tech heard me and said, "And what are we having with that steak?"  I said, "A baked potato with sour cream, bacon bites, and tons of cheese!"  Then a contraction.

It's time.  I'm pushing, pushing, pushing.  Dr.  Auerbach looked up at me, "Tisha, you have to push as hard as you can.  Your baby's heart rate is dropping very low and we have to get this baby out.  You can help me or I can do it the hard way."  I was pushing so hard I almost passed out from the lack of air.  But in the end he cut me open, yes down there, to give my son "lots" of room.  He was born.  The first thing I asked, "Is he breathing?"  The doctor held him up and he was blue.  He looked so lifeless.  He was handed over to the NICU team that was awaiting his arrival.

Sarah told me everything would be O.K. and she would check on me tomorrow.  I thanked her for staying with me.  It was passed her shift, so staying meant alot to me.  We went back to my room to get cleaned up.  All I keep asking, "When can I see my son?"  "The doctor will be in to talk to you as soon as they get him all comfortable.", said the nurse.

I called my mother to give her the great news.  She was once again a grandmother to a beautiful baby boy.  She was just crying and crying.  I know her heart was aching because she couldn't be with me.  In that moment I knew exactly how my mother felt.  Here I was in the same hospital with my son and I couldn't be with him.  We cried, said our goodbyes and I promised my mom that I would be O.K.

At 1:27am (which by the way is the exact time I was born), I got wheeled down to the NICU to see my son.  There he was laying in that tiny bed.  He had tubes all around him.  I remember counting his fingers and his toes.  I touched his little body all over.  I stood next to him and whispered to him that mommy was here and will always be here.  I never cried.  It was like my tears dried up before I went into the NICU.  I think I feared if I cried, then my son would feel his mother's sadness and would make him sad.  When all I wanted was for him to focus on growing and getting better.

For the next 50 days I went to see my son every single day.  All my energy was focused on him.  I remember when he was 2 weeks old, I heard him cry for the very first time.  I just started bawling.  I thought they were hurting him.  The beginning was rough.  He had a tube put into his side to drain fluid, he had a hemorrhage in his left eye, hernia in his belly button and he had to have 3 blood transfusions.  Even through all that I knew my son would be o.k.  I stayed strong for him and for he was my strength to get through every single day. 

Aiden is my miracle and I thank the heavens above that he spared my son so he could be with me.  I have to believe Aiden was put on this earth for a reason and he was born early for a reason.  He is my pride and joy and I cannot believe he will be 5 years old this year.

His Nana visiting him for the 1st time

Hand in Hand

Daddy holding his son for the 1st time

Saying Good-Bye to my hospital family

I would also like to take a moment to warn all the girls in this world.... Aiden is my baby.  I will never "give him away" like I will my daughters'.  You hurt my son, I will hurt you.  If he decides to marry you, you better make sure you buy me a ring because you will be marrying me too!  He is my baby and will always be my baby.  So, women...Just remember this warning.